Transition Aging Parents

If you're like me, your thoughts are on your Christmas shopping.  I'm buying for 3 elderly people, my mother and the two ladies I visit weekly in their nursing homes.  In my mind, I've been all over the place with gift ideas.  I know none of these folks have a lot of room for items on dressers, nightstands or even walls.  So, I struggled with the gift that would mean the most to them.  I want to share those and other ideas with you.  Although our aging parents treasure most the time we spend with them, and our visits and calls throughout the year, everyone loves opening a gift at Christmastime.  It makes us feel like a child again!

Here are some of my ideas.  I hope you'll share your ideas at "Transition Aging Parents" Facebook fan page (or you can email me at dale.carter@transitionagingparents.com)

1.  Digital keychain.  You might want to casually ask if your parent would be interested in this.  My mother said yes, she has good vision/small motor capabilities.  Also, she is very proud to own and use any "new" technology. My husband was a little skeptical of how clear the picture could be in such a small area, but there is clarity.  The keychain I bought holds 60 photos.  It was simple to load and I believe it will be simple for my mother to cycle through the photos.  I think she'll enjoy it as she goes about her daily activities at her retirement community, socializing with her friends, sharing family photos on her new keychain.  Even if she doesn't like it when she gets it in her hands, it was only $8.  (Note: If this is not right for your parent, consider grabbing a stash of their favorite photos and creating a beautiful album as a gift!)

2.  Boxes of decorative cards.  The two ladies I visit in nursing homes love to have me write cards to their family and friends.  It gives them great joy to find particularly unusual and beautiful cards.  The cover of the card is often as important to them as the words they ask me to write inside.  These cards (gifts from me) become gifts to others.  Don't you just love the gift that keeps giving?

3.  Boxes of herbal teas.  My mother especially loves Lemon Zinger.  It soothes her throat, provides steamy moisture for her sometimes problematic sinuses and the aroma lifts her spirits.  Also consider cinnamon and ginger.  These fragrant teas not only taste and smell good, they have been shown to be calming.

4. Burt's Bees or other lip balms.  Most of us deal with dry skin in the winter.  It can really be a difficult, persistent problem for the elderly in the dry inside heat and when they do go outside into the cold.  The one lady I visit loves Burt's Bees so very much, she has a collection in different colors and flavors.  When I arrive on Wednesdays, the first thing she does is pick out her earrings for the day and then her Burt's bee lip gloss.  I put it on her, and she always says, "Now I feel good!".

5. Audio books. If your aging parent loves to read but is struggling with vision problems, even large print books, consider audio books.  Know that your local library has a great selection.  Ask your parent what genre, author or books they have loved in the past, and go from there.  Also, I found a really helpful conversation between some adult children sharing what audio their aging parents loved.  Check it out at:

http://bookclubs.barnesandnoble.com/t5/Community-Room/RFI-audio-books-for-elderly-parent/m-p/279480

6. If you parent lives in a retirement community and has pets, consider giving food and little toys for the animal.  If they have a cat, consider giving a box of cat litter (that can be quite expensive).  If you're not an animal owner/lover, do not underestimate how important these little creatures are to their elderly owners!  My mother's neighbor has 2 cats.  He loves it when I send my mother a card, and put a PS, "please say hi to Jasmine and Tiffany and give them a pet for me!"  She shares the card with her neighbor and says reading that just lights her neighbor's face up.

7.  An emergency battery-powered radio.  My mother had to really hunt for one.   Even though she lives in a senior living community, this makes her feel more secure during storms when they do occasionally lose power.

8.  Cloth bags for shopping.  My mother loves these.  They are easier for her to carry (than plastic) and she likes it that she's doing something good for the environment.  Check out the "Go Green for Grandpa" bags, designed by a college student with proceeds going to Alzheimer's Association in memory of her grandfather.  To order, you can contact Jocelyn at  GoingGreenForGrandpa@gmail.com

9.  Warm or decorative  scarfs.  Even if your parent or loved one does not get out much, the elderly still appreciate the warmth and beauty of some item like a neck scarf.

I hope these ideas give you ideas so you can, in turn, give your aging parent moments of anticipation and joy as they unwrap their gifts.  As always, remember to give your parents the gift of your presence (visits and calls).  Be in the present moment with them, and you too will receive "the gift".

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