Esther was living in a family
group home at age 88. She had advanced dementia and suffered a previous stroke. Leann took care of Esther in her private caregiving home and was alarmed when Esther’s blood pressure dropped suddenly as she became sweaty and unresponsive.
Esther’s daughter, Sue, was responsible for making healthcare
decisions for her mother, but she resided out of state. The physician spoke to Sue directly and relayed his concerns about her mother’s worsening medical condition. Sue was not prepared to simply give her mother comfort care and allow her to die. She needed to first consult with other family members. The physician proceeded with standard emergency protocol to diagnose and treat Esther’s disease process while Leann felt vindicated for being on top of the
situation.
Within minutes, Sue phoned back and reversed her decision. Ann had spoken with her sister who had worked for hospice, advising her not to prolong their mother’s life. Esther was to receive comfort care and be returned to Leann’s group home. Leann reluctantly conceded. Meanwhile, Esther seemed to
be improving. Sue was notified of Esther’s recovery, but she remained firm in the decision to consult hospice and provide comfort care.
The conflicts that occur with life-and-death decisions put caregivers at odds with one another and loved ones in jeopardy. The power of attorney not only needs to make
proper decisions for their loved one, but also must resolve conflicts between family members who want to do more and those that prefer to do less.
The following tools need to be readily available for family caregivers when called upon to withhold or withdraw care from a
loved one: