5 Reasons Why I Don't Hide Vegetables in My Family's Food... and What You
Can Try Instead
By
Kathleen Cuneo, Ph.D.
Parents frequently ask me what I think about the cookbooks
based upon the concept of sneaking vegetables into our kids' meals. I have
never made any of the recipes in these cookbooks. I know when my kids were
younger, there were times when I would have been tempted to try something like
that because I worried more about their eating than I do now and I was not yet
educated about Ellyn Satter's division of responsibility in feeding. Since
those cookbooks did not exist when my oldest - and pickiest - daughter was a
toddler, I did not have the opportunity to try this approach. From where I
stand now, however, I'm glad I didn't. And even though now I have had
opportunities to try this approach to feeding, I have consciously decided not
to. Here's why:
1. It's too much work. It takes enough
time just to plan and prepare meals in addition to all my other work and family
responsibilities. I really don't want to take extra time to prepare special vegetable
purees to later hide in my meals. Instead, I prefer to spend time and effort
into trying new ways to prepare vegetables that taste good. I'm always looking
for new recipes to experiment with on my family.
2. I want my kids to learn to accept and enjoy
vegetables. If their only experience of vegetables is hidden in another
dish, they are denied the opportunity of learning that they might actually like
some vegetables. Instead, I offer a variety of vegetables, prepared in
different ways throughout the week and apply Ellyn Satter's division of
responsibility in my approach to feeding my kids. I also frequently ask my kids
for their input in planning meals, including their fruit and vegetable choices.
3. I'm not very comfortable being deceptive. I
can barely pull off the Santa Claus story, and that's something I value. I
don't value being sneaky when it comes to food. In the long run, I believe that
I would be undermining my children's trust in me. My kids are pretty savvy and
can tell when something tastes different. They would be more likely to reject
something when they feel they've been tricked. Instead, I'm very upfront about
what food is on the table and don't put much pressure on them to eat it - at
least I try not to most of the time.
4. I think it can backfire. I don't want
to inadvertently teach my kids to dislike vegetables by sending them the
message that they're not good enough to be eaten as they are and must be
hidden. Instead, my kids see my husband and I enjoying vegetables.
5. Taste
matters. As I said above, I think many people can tell the difference in
taste when something is added. When I eat a brownie, I want it to taste the way
I expect a brownie to taste. Actually my kids frequently prefer their foods to be separate rather than
mixed in casseroles or soups, and I don't interfere with them picking individual
disliked ingredients out of their meals because I have some respect for their
individual taste preferences.
So if you are using the sneaky approach, I encourage you
just to take a moment to think about it. My intent is not to cause guilt, but
rather to give you some things to think about. Most parents who hide vegetables
in their children's food are usually motivated by the admirable parenting goal
of having their children "eat healthy," but I'd like to suggest that you shoot
for a more long-term goal of teaching them to make healthy choices on their
own. Hiding vegetables limits their opportunities for learning.