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Hi
My New year's resolution this year has been to become friends with
time...and as I do...I have been feeling such a willingness to be
simply happy with what is....whatever it is. As I become friendly with
each moment of time, my life is not so marked by reactions to people
and events but is more of a curious witness to what unfolds.
Perhaps my life is fuller than it ever has been with work, school, my
writings and with connections with many people throughout the day, but
I can see as I become more present...I am improving my uneasy
relationship with time.
Ondrea and I did a session with our business coach recently
and she pointed out how much I talk about time and how many of my
dreams involve "having time". I have also been going over my journals these
past weeks and have been seeing how uncomfortable my relationship has
been with time. I have felt like a continual victim to "not enough
time". I have recently created a new journaling e-course based on making friends with time called 30 Days of Inspired Creativity.
I sense that in the past...my
constant longing to have enough "time" alone to create... and to be
"myself" was because much of my being "in the world" and in relationship
with others was false. I was coming from who I thought I "should" be
with others instead of the truth of who I am and it was exhausting.
These days I just am myself...I am present to the truth of myself in
all situations and this feeds me energy. I no longer so deeply "crave
time" to be alone and to "be myself" because every moment is a time to
be myself.
Eckhart Tolle describes the concept of time so perfectly:
"The
elimination of time from your consciousness is the elimination of ego.
What we are speaking of is the elimination of psychological time, which
is the mind's endless preoccupation with past and future and it's
unwillingness to be one with life by living in alignment with the
inevitable is-ness of the present moment."
Whenever your
habitual no to life turns to a yes, whenever you allow this moment to
be as it is, you dissolve time as well as ego. For the ego to survive
it must make time - past and future - more important than the present
moment. When you react against the form that life takes at this moment,
when you treat the now as a means, an obstacle or an enemy, you
strengthen your ego. Hence the ego's reactivity.
The
more reactive you are, the more entangled you become with form. The
more identified with form, the stronger the ego. Your being then does
not shine through form anymore - or only barely.
Though
non-resistance to form, that in you which is beyond form emerges as an
all encompassing Presence. It is more deeply who you are than anything
in the world of form."
What I can say about time is that I
am learning to be in it without resistance and for the most part of my
day I am able to be at peace. I do not allow myself to think ahead so
much. I try not to mull over the past so much unless it relates to a
present upset. If I am commuting to work or school, I see the house
that I pass, I notice the sun on the fence and the manicured lawn. I
see beauty around me.
If I am cooking dinner after work...the candles
get lit, the jazz music is turned on and I am just puttering and
cooking. If I am walking with my daughter, we are just walking. We look
at the stars in the night sky, we meander, we laugh. There is a perfect
peace in that. In the midst of a busy life, I can be timeless.
Love to you,
Shelley
"From wonder into wonder existence opens." -Lao-Tzu
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