Hi ,
People are often surprised when I tell them I have clear memories, going back to before I could even talk!
I know that most folks don't remember toddling around their
homes when the only words in their budding vocabulary were "Mummy" and "No!". But I do.
As my vocabulary grew, however, the one thing that remained the same was something I couldn't put into
words until I was well into my 30's: my extremely high sensitivity!
I recall being confused - frequently - when an adult would speak and act outwardly normal while, at the same time, I could feel sadness, anger, despair,
even anguish behind their stoic facial expressions. I was also sensitive to spaces, light, crowds, noise, and energy.
As a child, I thought everyone could
feel other people's emotional landscapes.
I felt everything so deeply. I remember my dad telling me all the time that I was "too sensitive".
Perhaps hardest of all, I couldn't discern between the feelings that were mine and those that were not. As a result, I just didn't know what to do with the intense emotions - I was inconsolable when I cried, untameable when I raged. There were just too many feelings crashing around inside me - many of which
weren't even mine.
Some time ago, I was working with a highly sensitive, 4-year child, at the request of her mom, a coaching client. This little one had been having very alarming angry, even violent outbursts that were completely out of character with her normally sweet and happy
disposition.
I shared with her the story of a little mouse named Cameron, whose ears were SO BIG he could hear the feelings ALL the other animals in the forest had in their bodies! But because Cameron was so little, he didn't know that the feelings coming in
through his ears and landing in his heart didn't belong to him.
I asked this overwhelmed little girl if she had ever experienced this feeling of having other people's feelings inside her body. She looked at me sadly, and said in a
heartbreaking tone,
"Erin, sometimes it feels like I have all the feelings of the whole entire world inside my body".
Boy, could I ever relate to how that feels.
Once we figured out who, specifically, this 4-year-old was 'downloading' feelings from; and cleared that energetic connection; her mom said, simply yet profoundly, "I got my kid back".
To this day - 3 years later - she has never had another raging, violent outburst. We did a few more sessions to help this little one learn about energetic boundaries; and how to discern between her feelings and other people's, among other things.
I cannot express just how much I wish I'd had someone to help me discover how to work with the high sensitivity I struggled with well into my 30's - when I finally stumbled onto information about Highly Sensitive People (HSP's).
Does my story sound at all familiar to you?
My friend, Gitte Lassen, Positive Power Pilgrim and a Highly Sensitive Woman, has been helping Highly Sensitive People for over 15 years. She taught me that not only is there research about HSP's, but that there are clear signs of high sensitivity:
- Do you get rattled when you have a lot to
do in a short amount of time?
- Do you make a point of avoiding violent movies and TV shows?
- Do you need to withdraw during busy days, into bed or a darkened room or some other place where you can have privacy and relief from the situation?
- Do you make it a
high priority to arrange your life to avoid upsetting or overwhelming situations?
- Do you notice or enjoy delicate or fine scents,
tastes, sounds, or works of art?
- Do you have a rich and complex inner life?
- When you were a child, did your parents or teachers see you as sensitive or shy?
- Are you easily overwhelmed by such things as bright lights, strong smells, coarse fabrics, or sirens nearby?
If you can say yes to one or more of these questions, you may be one of the 20% of the population that are born with a higher sensitivity.
In our society, sadly, it mostly seems like a curse when Highly Sensitive People (HSP) struggle with the overwhelm and exhaustion that they can’t seem to overcome.
To make matters worse, since other people don’t understand and appreciate the gift of the high sensitivity, HSPs are often given the message they “shouldn’t be so sensitive”. Of course, this makes it easy for them to dislike their beautiful sensitivity instead of appreciating it for the gift it is.
It doesn’t have to be this way!
I know from experience - my own and others' - that being a Highly Sensitive woman or man can feel like a curse. However, but it can also become a blessing.
My friend Gitte helps Highly Sensitive People to overcome the downsides so that this can
become the BEST thing in our lives!
Because I've seen, first hand, how powerful Gitte's work is in helping people with this transformation, she and I have been talking about how to reach
out and share her knowledge with more HSP's (like me!).
I've been very lucky to have Gitte offer her knowledge and expertise to my community through an
online
webinar that I'll be hosting with her (and no, it is not about stress management!).
That's right - you're going to get BOTH of us on this free
webinar,
It's happening in just ONE WEEK: Tuesday, April 21st at 5:30pm Eastern Time.
In this webinar
you’ll learn about the things only HSP's struggle with - things that make it so hard for us to find balance in our lives and stop feeling like there is something "wrong" with us.
Gitte will reveal:
- The unique struggles HSPs face in today's society
- How HSPs need more than time and stress management
- How to have people respect you for your high sensitivity
...and more
I look forward to connecting with you on the webinar!
Warmest
thoughts,
Erin Bentley, MA
Total Relationship Coach, Author, Workshop Leader
PPS Even if you cannot make it at the live event, sign-up anyway and listen to the replay. I promise you, if you are Highly Sensitive, you do not want to miss what Gitte has to say!
