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Happy Valentine's Day, Chinese New Year, and Nirvana Day!
February is a month where most of us think about love. We are all aware of the significance of February 14. Saint Valentine's Day is the annual holiday celebrated on February 14. It mainly focuses on the intimate love between two people. The holiday was established over 1500 years ago, in 496 AD by Pope Gelasius I, and is traditionally the day where lovers express love for one another by giving and receiving gifts of flowers, candy or cards.
In addition, Nirvana Day is celebrated during this month (on either February 8 or February 15, depending on which Buddhist sect you follow). Nirvana Day is the celebration of Buddha's death when he reached total nirvana, at the age of 80. While many of us are reminded to celebrate nirvana with one special loved one, real nirvana is based upon a greater love...the love inside all of us that we share with each other and with our creator.
Interestingly, this year both the Chinese New Year and the Tibetan New Year coincide on the same day as Valentine's Day...signifying the beginning of something new! Indeed, even the New Moon arises today on February 14. So instead of focusing on your love with just one person, why not begin anew with the chance to receive love wholly from everywhere in the universe...beginning within yourself?
February: The Month of Love
This is the month of love. It is a month where each of us looks at our lives and wants to be loved. Everywhere I look, I see so many people searching for love. I know people who either have a 'boyfriend' or a 'girlfriend' and/or, those who are having sex, yet they tell me they feel lonely and without love. I even have friends who are married who inform me they feel no one loves them.
So, as this week started off, I sat looking at the computer wondering what could I, a single gal, say that would be of benefit to so many people who are searching for love. In the end, the spirit of love sent help to me and, ultimately, sent it to you, as well.
I wanted to get this newsletter out early in the month. Each time I began writing, I was stuck. At first, I kept using the excuse that my last newsletter went out late in January and so, it would be better if I got this one out a little later. However, as each day of February clicked by, I knew there was something more to it. I was searching for something 'profound' to say...and nothing was coming to mind.
Last Thursday, it began snowing early in the morning...an unusual occurrence for Texas. Since it was not sticking to the roads, I thought it was pretty cool. As I looked out the window, the flakes were huge and the snow fell at a fast rate. More and more snow kept falling throughout the day and I continued to procrastinate. Getting up from the computer to check the snow's progress. I would periodically open the front or back door, watching the beautiful snowflakes fall. Before long, everything was completely covered. By the end of the day, the Dallas-Fort Worth area had received a record snowfall...officially 12.5 inches of snow!
News reporters showed numerous people loving the snow and playing in the uncommon winter wonderland. It was an opportunity for people to take a day off from work. Kids got to stay home from school and play. Yippee! Even though driving on the roads was precarious, we all were secretly saying, "It is time to party. Let's play!" I too loved it.
However, I soon discovered that not all living things liked the snow. Besides the trees, whose branches were easily snapping from the weight of the snow, small animals were having a hard time navigating their way through the thick powder.
I have a little dog. Her name is Libby. She is a mutt...a terrier mix. My sister once described her as 'a little rat.' When she made the comment, Libby was only a puppy, and I guess, she did kind of look like a rat, as she has muddled, gray, wiry hair and at the time she only weighed about 7 lbs. However, if she were a rat, she would be a pretty good-sized one that I would definitely avoid. But, as any dog lover will attest, my sister was flat out wrong. Libby is SOOO much cuter than a rat. In addition, she is incredibly smart! Unlike most puppies, she never chewed up my shoes or furnitiure...only a rat would do that! She, like a rat though, is not very tall and as the snow got deeper and deeper, I soon learned why she did not share in everyone's enthusiasm over the beautiful, white blanket of snow.
Libby is pretty much an inside dog. The only time she ventures outdoors is to use the facilities or go for a ride in the car with her momma (me!). If she has to pee or take a dump, she lets me know. Thursday was no exception. However, when confronted with the new surroundings, she was slightly hesitant to move across the landscape. Each time I opened the door, she had an expectation that she would be able to do her job without any interference or challenge. I had the same expectation. However, when she looked at the snow, she would turn and then queerly gaze back at me, as if beckoning me to remove it! I would explain to her that although I may be capable of all things to her, I did not have the ability to remove the snow...at least not without a shovel...and come on...do you really think I was going to do that?! She would just have to make the most of it like the rest of us.
She was not happy. Instead, she dug in her heals and held her bladder and bowel. Hour after hour, she was getting more uncomfortable. By the third time out, she tried walking across the snow...but to her shock (and mine) she sank, the snow covering over half her small body. Although it appeared funny to me, she was not amused. She could barely move. Scared, she managed to make it to the safety of hard ground and back into the house and back into her comfort zone.
Libby has the uncanny ability to hold onto her crap for a long time! Does that sound familiar? I think all of us can hold onto our own 'crap' for quite some time until we are forced to release it. That was the case with my dear little Libby. Although, it took numerous trips outdoors, it was not until Libby was so uncomfortable that she finally released her load. Even though she thought there was nowhere to go, until she was forced to do so, she was not able to find a spot to let go. As she did, I got that 'inspiration' I needed for my newsletter. Funny how the universe works sometimes, isn't it?
How did Libby finally let go? She found a spot near the house that was not covered with snow. It was an area where the overhanging soffits on the house did not allow any snow to accumulate on the west side of the house. If she had gone to the east side, she would have been confronted with snowdrifts resting up against the house...and no open grass to use. However, as luck would have it (or was it something else?), she went to the west side of the house.
You may not be familiar with the bathroom habits of dogs, but they prefer to roam a large area before relieving themselves. Although Libby did not have this luxury, there was a place to be excused. The spot on the west side was very small and narrow, yet it still provided some space for her where she did not sink or get her feet incredibly frozen. It took getting to an uncomfortable place for her to find it.
We all have a place that can give us comfort and love...where we can release all our problems. Although we may initially take a familiar path, that path can sometimes become hazardous, forcing us to look elsewhere. If we continue to take the familiar road, we may sink. It may just be that getting to a most 'uncomfortable ' place is necessary before we can find that open place...but it is always there. We can dig our heals in, not seeing what is right in front of us...but it is always there.
When confronted by obvious outside influences, such as Valentine's Day where there is an expectation of certain love, we can miss the opportunity that is already there, just as Libby did. Right now, many of you are searching for love. It is already there. We all have love within. It is a matter of looking for it. If you are uncomfortable in your relationships right now, maybe you are being guided to release old baggage so that the true love of the universe can fill you...the love that exists within all of us...the love of God. When we find and embrace this love, we can find incredible comfort. Instead of looking outside for love...why not begin to look inside? It is there...a green, open patch waiting for you!
What is True Love?
What is the definition of true love? I think most people tend to think of true love as that one soul mate that 'completes' them. However, using a quote from Shaman Charles Crooks, "We are all part of the whole and not separate" creates a dilemma when it comes to this perception of true love. How can one be incomplete when we are all part of the whole?
I think the answer lies in the fact that true love may be something quite different. When we expect another to complete us, we are in essence stating that we are inferior. We are looking out for ourselves only...it is a selfish act. However, as Antoine De Saint-Exupery so eloquently stated, "True Love begins when nothing is looked for in return."
As for myself, I have experienced true love as I have loved many people, but have not sought anything in return. This includes family, children, friends and even unrequited loves. Yes, I may have been sad that someone I loved did not outwardly love me in return. Yet, I still loved them despite this fact. To love another even though the love returned is not in the form you wish, is the real definition of true love. Remember, we are all part of the whole and therefore, the love another person may have for someone else is really a love in which you share. It may not be physical love...but, it is a purer, more spiritual love.
So, when you think you are all alone and without love, look around. Enjoy the love that is everywhere...you share it with all!
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To Your Happiness and Joy!
Cindy L. Herb
"The Joyful Survivor" |
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