The surest way to torpedo any decision is to begin without a clear vision
of the value that you must protect.
It wastes energy starting fuzzy.
Please note, that I did not say that you needed to know HOW you were going to create that value. You don’t need the HOW, you do need to know WHAT value you want around this decision.
A really obvious example: say you want to enter a relationship with your perfect Alpha mate.
You may not know “how” to meet him, but you can be very clear on WHAT VALUES YOU WANT and be committed to that kind of man.
I have an Alpha who worked on that values goal with me and she attracted a number of very high-quality suitors (dates “transporting her in a private plane” quality).
I reminded her to stay Committed to the values she said she wanted originally to chuck out a few and focus on the kind of “who” she was COMMITTED to having.
We figured out the WHO (her “what”) and God supplied the HOW.
You must be clear on what value/s you are Committed to BEFORE deciding anything.
Next, you need to know your WHY.
The WHY is almost more important than the WHAT truthfully.
Your Why drives the strength of your commitment to your value.
Here’s a weak why for wanting that Alpha Mate:
A woman is looking for a man to complete her, to overlook all of the areas in her life that are full of emotional junk and chaos and “just love her anyway”… she is in TROUBLE.
That particular WHY is it at cross purposes to the Universe’s intention that we grow and heal our wounds.
Short answer: Not gonna work out. (You can’t opt of growing by having a mate that just says – “Nah, you’re fine.”)
When you’re setting yourself up for success, it is critical that your WHY is clean and focused on your highest values.
Your WHY should be loved based.
When you want to make a decision, first find WHAT value you are committed to (like healthy marriage) and then find your love based reason WHY that that Commitment HAS to happen (like it frees my energy to teach).
