Just stick by him and he'll see how good you are!

,

I wanted to share with you a story about this girl I knew.

Back when I dated this 50/50 "men and women are the same" below bare minimum dude, he had a very close friend who was a cheater.

Any and every opportunity he had, he would cheat on his long time girlfriend. 

She would find out, cry, they would fight and then make up. 

There was this one time towards the end of my relationship with my ex where she was consoling me when I told her that I was planning on breaking up with him. And I remember so vividly that she said to me "just stick by him, and be there for him, and he will see how much you love him." 

I told her that I didn't need him to see how much I loved him, I needed him to show me how much HE LOVED ME. And it wasn't happening.

But the point is, for the longest time, I couldn't figure out why she stayed after being cheated on so many times... and when she said that, it all made sense.

She thought that by enduring all the pain he put her through, by being there as his day one woman, by being his ride or die, by forgiving all of the messed up things he did, he would always come back and CHOOSE HER.

She glorified his return thinking that it meant she was the best girl for him when she is actually just the only girl who would tolerate his bullsh*t.

I always say, getting into a relationship is easy. Male attention is abundant. 

The goal is never just to get into a relationship -- you want to be in a relationship with a quality man. 

Staying with a guy who repeatedly hurts you because you think this is what loyalty and sticking by him means is 1000000% absurd. 

This is not loyalty. And loyalty is not blind. 

No one deserves to go through the pain of being betrayed once, let alone over and over again. 

No relationship should hurt you like that.

No man is worth all of that. 

Anyways, they got married. And I broke up with my ex. And sometimes I think about her and how she's doing...and how I hope she finds my content some day. 

Don't be a her and choose your "feelings" over your self worth.

Come learn how to repel dusties and hang out with me for Galentine's.

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Can't wait to see you soon!

Much love,

Your big sis - Nadeen

P.S: this is part of my 14 day dating advice series so if you don't see the preceding ones, check your spam! Otherwise, you can view my previous newsletters in my hub here.