Â
JUST KIDDING!
Â
Hi ,
Â
I just wanted to continue what I wrote in the caption from today's reel - I responded to a group of girls yelling at a man who was offering to help them take a group
picture...
Â
I suggest you watch the reel and read the caption first before reading this email.
Â
This is exactly why you need to learn how to emotionally regulate your feelings, reactions, and responses as well as practice and get very good at judging situations or people that may not be as obvious or straight forward.Â
Â
And this isn’t just around men.Â
Â
This is around people in
general.Â
Â
This skill, in my opinion, is very important for every feminine girly and high value woman because it relates to your emotional intelligence.Â
Â
We don’t need to explicitly state that “not all men" are bad, but we know it’s not all men.Â
Â
However, that doesn’t take away from the fact that all men have the capacity to treat you poorly.Â
Â
He’s human.Â
Â
We’re
human.Â
Â
We can treat others poorly as well - it’s literally a decision.Â
Â
The thing with our judgment is that it takes practice, especially when our judgment hasn’t always been good in the past.Â
Â
In our healing phase, there’s a stage where we just kind of reject all men but it’s not that we don’t trust them… it’s more that we don’t trust ourselves because of past bad experiences with sh*tty men.Â
Â
We
don’t yet know how to discern between good and bad men, we don’t know how to tell what their intentions are, and honestly, we don’t know how to stay emotionally disciplined so we’re scared to fall for the wrong guys again… so it’s much easier to deny and reject all men or make all men pay for the mistakes of our exes while we go through our own healing process.
Â
I see a lot of girls become jaded and swear off all men though.Â
Â
Or they start dating again,
but they have this very negative view of men.Â
Â
Or they start treating men very poorly…
Â
And the thing you have to realize… is that you can’t desire a healthy loving relationship with a healthy strong masculine good man when you treat men like they’re the opp.Â
Â
You can’t just think that the only good man out there is the man for you, and the rest of his kind are trash or unworthy.Â
Â
Because you wouldn’t want
to be with a man who thinks that about women either right?
Â
Imagine how awkward, uncomfortable, icky, and unhealthy it would be if he says that all women are trash except you...?Â
Â
Our minds simply do not work that way - you cannot think that no good men exist and all men are bad, and then hope to be in a healthy happy relationship...
Â
You'll end up attracting toxic bad men because that's what you think of
them.Â
Â
(A-ha! Also why men who have bad experiences with women keep attracting bad women because they don't think good women exist!)
Â
I guess what I’m trying to say is that there are a lot of bad men out there who will try to take advantage of you.Â
Â
But if you believe that all men are like this, you won't find your Mr. Hubby.
And while we're not given a handbook to scope out covert narcissists and f*ckboys and
misogynistic men, we have to try our best and use our discernment when interacting with them.Â
Â
Whether or not you are a classy woman is irrelevant to other people because it's who YOU are.Â
Â
So if someone has manners and is being polite to you, and they’re not showing any bad intentions, it's not right to be demeaning or rude in response.
Â
You’re not obligated to accept their help or their advances, but you can politely decline and
move on. Â
Â
But if this man is openly rude and predatory, that’s a different story sis.Â
Â
Â
I love you lots,
Your big sis bestie - NadeenÂ