Frosty Fingers & the Stockdale Paradox: A Dancing Rabbit “WHY?”

Dear friends of Dancing Rabbit,

Before I hand it over to Danielle for some reflections into why she has chosen life in community, a quick update on the status of our End of Year fundraising campaign. So far, we’ve raised $2836 out of our $12,000 matching goal. We’ve got until midnight on New Year’s Eve to raise the rest!

Donate! Double your impact, and lend a hand in the Climate Comeback!

In resilience,

Eric

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That dreaded familiar feeling begins to creep into my fingertips. It’s an ache that seems both dull and sharp at the same time, increasing little by little as my fingers work deftly to clip each article of freshly washed clothing to the line with a pin. I look at how much laundry there is left to hang, and I wonder if I can finish it all before my fingers slow down and lose some of their agility as they start to go numb.

Danielle’s clothes drying on the line in a warmer season. Photo by Karen Hanrahan (it was too cold at the time of writing this article to take a current photo!)

Danielle here, noting that hanging laundry outside when it is 22 degrees is a lot less idyllic than homesteading blogs make it out to be. I nostalgically recall the dryer at my sister’s house, located indoors where even the utility room has a heated floor. Somehow the memory of it feels even more cozy and enjoyable than the original experience, especially in comparison to the cold whips of wind on my face and amplifying pain in my fingers.

As often happens for humans, the discomfort I’m feeling starts to stimulate doubt and questioning. There’s so many other things I need to be doing right now; why do I choose a lifestyle where things like this take up more time, in addition to making me cold and uncomfortable?

I finish hanging the last piece of laundry and step inside my little round hobbit house, eagerly reaching hands up to neck to alleviate the painful sensations brought on by the cold exposure. Warmth begins to return to the tips of my fingers and they soon return to normal. The questions, however, stay with me throughout the day.

Why do I live this way? Why would a human, in this age of smart phones and smart ovens and techno-Amazon-convenience, voluntarily give up the ease and comfort that our forebears fervently sought? Why is it that not just me and my neighbors, but hundreds of people each year seek out this way of life, some coming to visit Dancing Rabbit because they long for a taste of voluntary additional difficulty (aka simplicity)?

Sign for the Hermitage made by former Rabbit, Frank.

The questions start to guide my focus throughout the day as my subconscious chews on them like a piece of gum. As I leave the Hermitage (my house), I notice the new house sign lovingly crafted by an old friend who used to live here. I see the holiday lights I strung up around the solar panels, and think about our village commitment to export more power to the local energy grid than we consume. I see friends walking towards the newly finished sauna and wonder to myself, where else can you go for a sauna and be assured that everyone else you see there will be someone you know? (cue the Cheers jingle).

I receive a text from a former Dancing Rabbit member and stop to reflect on the positive impact she’s having coaching clients into greater emotional and relational competency. She launched her coaching business while living here at Dancing Rabbit and has taken the “soft skills” of community out to influence the wider world since she moved away. How many other examples are there of people who have been touched and changed by this place, that I don’t even know about?

Danielle with Kassandra and her two daughters - former Rabbits now living in Boulder.

Up at the Common House, amidst the backdrop of children playing in the kids’ room and adults meeting the newest baby Rabbit that was just born in mid-December, I put on my work-for-the-nonprofit hat. A coworker shares that a recent visitor decided to gift an inspiring sum of money to the nonprofit, and the donor wants it to go towards reducing affordability obstacles for those who want to attend a Dancing Rabbit visitor program, so that more people can have a life-changing experience here like they did.

I hear one of the teens mention Instagram and my mind conjures the memory of the diligent social-media-preneur who came to Dancing Rabbit as a work exchanger this summer. She gave months of her time and talent to introducing more people in the world to the merits of Dancing Rabbit via the most-viewed reels ever posted on our Instagram.

Late in the afternoon, I attend an interview with some community mates that are considering stepping up more in their responsibilities so that I can transition out of the executive director role and into a different chapter in my own life. We discuss the pitfalls and drawbacks of balancing money and nonprofit operations with the huge desire we all have to be accessible to all and helping folks integrate sustainability and contribution into their best life. When working at Dancing Rabbit, there is no question that values are the main driver of our activities, not profit. I wonder how many folks out there can say the same?

At the end of the day, I walk home and pass Tamar’s cabin. I picture my eloquent friend Prairie who used to live there. She is now off in the world earning her GED, performing at open mic nights in the city and upskilling in new ways that will amplify her contribution to the world in the future. During her six years at DR my connection with Prairie danced between dimensions of friendship and mentorship, and we even became coworkers last year after I hired her for CSCC’s correspondent role and to venture out on a Dancing Rabbit speaking tour. Multi-faceted relationships like that are rare in other places, I suspect. Yet, like this and all the other special things my attention drifted to, they add meaning to life that cannot be replaced with any sort of social media engagement.

Prairie, Nathan, and Danielle at Prairie’s going away party in September

So yes, I spend more time hanging laundry in frigid temperatures than might be comfortable, but the symbolism of that act is meaningful. In a world where the unaccounted for costs of rugged individualism and the pursuit of profit are destroying, amongst many things, the lungs of our planet (the Amazon Rainforest), lifestyle choices like this become even more radical. We can bring a lens of socially responsible questioning to uplevel our choices at home, and also at work and other areas of our life. Do our professional efforts feed the beast or build the new paradigm? How about our relationships, both professional and personal? Do we restrict ourselves to interacting only with those we like and agree with, or can we engage with and learn by keeping our mind open to those who challenge us? Finally, the question I ask myself more and more often nowadays: how can the money that comes in my direction be funneled towards averting the greatest peril facing humanity? How can I not turn away, and instead contribute to the most essential undertaking of our times, directing all my resources to catalyze the critical collective mission: the Climate Comeback?

Our collective future is not decided yet, but even our small daily actions can make a difference, especially as they compound over time. As Jamie Wheal puts it, “We are all in the Stockdale Paradox at this point: the people who survive are the people who balance ruthless assessment of current reality without ever letting go of commitment to the long term positive outcome.”

Commitment to the long term positive outcome, even when it entails sacrifice of short term comfort; that, in a nutshell, is my why. I suspect that is the why, the motive, for many of the friends, neighbors, recent visitors and work exchangers that came to mind today. Perhaps for you as well?

If, despite all the dangerous odds and frightening facts, you are indeed committed to that long term positive outcome, like I am, let us know. Send us a line, donate a dollar (or a dozen), share this post on social media, come visit us in 2024. And whatever time you spend outside in frigid temperatures this season, may it provoke you to appreciate the beauty that already exists in your life.

Danielle

P.S. I just noticed as I wrote that last section that the word “indeed” breaks down to “in deed.” What a good meaning there! May the emphasis of our commitment to a better world be expressed not through words and thoughts in 2024, but primarily through our deeds.

P.P.S. If donating is one awesome deed that would express your commitment to a healthy and habitable earth, then click here and extra sprinkles for you this season!