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“If only my mind would give me a break.” “How do I get these thoughts to stop?”
These are frustrations I hear a lot from people trying to find peace from their thoughts.
Well, I’ll let you in on a profound secret: you can’t make your thoughts stop.
And the more you try, the more you're actually focusing on the process of thinking and creating an inner war—you against your thoughts.
Remember: what you resist persists. Wanting your thoughts to stop is resisting them. You’re in a state of non-acceptance. Here they are, churning in your mind, and you’re wanting the moment to be different than it is.
Trying to get rid of thoughts actually energizes them—and it won’t bring you the peace you’re looking for.
But don’t lose hope…because freedom from the pull of thinking is absolutely possible. And it’s about shifting the relationship you have with your thoughts—not about getting rid of them.
Without realizing it, most of us are attached to the content of our thinking.
- We’re conditioned to go to our minds for information and guidance;
- We give our attention to every doubt and worry;
- We believe the thoughts that tell us we’re inadequate and unlovable.
No wonder we feel stressed!
There’s a completely different way to relate to our thinking other than believing it, which is to lose interest in what thoughts are telling us. That way you’re not fighting with thoughts or wanting them to go away.
They can be present, but you’re just not paying attention to what they’re saying.
Practice loosening your attachment to thoughts. Because once you’re less connected with the content of your mind, you’re more available to listen, engage, be curious, feel, expand, and fully live your lovely life.
Here are four insights about thoughts that might help…
#1: You are not your thoughts.
You existed long before you started thinking. There’s an innocent, original part of you that is naturally alive and aware, that has nothing to do with your thoughts.
Here’s an experiment for you to try: pretend that you’re not defined by your thoughts, and see if you’re still here. Get to know this “you” who is alive prior to your thoughts.
Your thoughts may tell you that you’re unworthy and limited, and they may tell you that you’ll be lost if you don’t worry incessantly. But without buying into these beliefs, you’re still here—and you’re way more at peace.
#2: You can choose how you relate to your thoughts.
Since your thoughts are not who you are, you can choose how much attention you give them. You can live in the stories they tell you, or you can see them as mental chatter, a droning sound in the background, that has no meaning whatsoever.
#3: You don’t have to believe the content of your thoughts.
Take a look at the content of your thoughts. If thinking is a problem for you, you will find that your thoughts are quite negative. They tell you to constantly be on guard so you can’t enjoy life. They fill you with doubt and concern. They judge everyone and everything.
They make you believe you’re a fraction of your true magnificence.
Bringing in insight #2, you can choose how you relate to these thoughts. Do you want to magnify this content and make it your reality? Or do you want to drop the thought-created reality and see things as they truly are?
#4: You can function very well in life without paying attention to thinking.
Most thinking is negative and useless. It’s just not needed. Sure you need thoughts to follow directions or plan a trip. But it is not your birthright to be stuck in ruminating thoughts that spin around and make you feel anxious.
When you don’t pay attention to thinking, you’re open to life as it is.
- You have a fresh perspective on everything;
- You relate to others with your heart open instead of with fear, lack, or judgment;
- You take things as they come without resisting them.
Why not try it?
Let go of your attachment to thinking and expand into the unknown, overflowing with potential. You’ll discover a whole new way of being…
