Maybe you don’t even notice when your mind takes off using incredibly harsh language to describe yourself.
There’s name-calling, swearing, degrading put-downs, and more.
I don’t even want to give this extreme language any emphasis by offering examples here, but you know what I’m talking about.
It’s a kind of violence turned inward.
We look at ourselves, other people, and the world through veiled eyes that see negativity, loss, rejection, and self-condemnation.
I have so much compassion when the inner critic appears. Its presence tells us that somehow we’ve taken on an identity that
just isn’t true.
If this shame-inducing tape is playing in your mind, it’s asking for your love and attention. Rather than hating it or wanting it to disappear, choose the kinder response: relate to this tape from a place of intelligence and compassion.
- First, neutralize the
language of these thoughts. Change it into words that are gentler and more benign. In the spirit of love, peace, and harmony, stop the inner name-calling and severe self-berating.
- Start with a deep, expanding breath. Then feel the feelings that underlie these critical thoughts, welcoming them in a warm and loving inner embrace. They’re the fuel for the inner critic,
and welcoming them in presence takes away their power.
Instead of the inner critic, consider discovering your inner coach or, as Tara Mohr suggests, your inner mentor instead. Let your thoughts support you to return to the peace and ease that are your birthright.
- Tell yourself:
- I’m okay.
- I can do this.
- These thoughts
don’t define me.
- I’m here and breathing.
Use language that is at least neutral and at best kind and caring.
If you live in the trance that makes you believe you’re inadequate and
undeserving, neutralize your inner language. It’s a tool that will help to untangle these painful identities—leaving space for the shining brilliance of your true nature.