The result of all this doing—and avoiding—is a constant state of anxiety. You know what that feels like, right? We can’t just be with whatever the present moment is offering, so our focus goes outside ourselves to activities, other people, or swirling in our own thoughts. The result is that we just don't feel okay.
Without realizing it, we’re feeding resistance and tension—and then wonder why we’re not happy.
And if you’re a spiritual seeker, running looks like this: signing up for the next program, listening to the next teacher, or watching the right video that will finally, hopefully show you the way.
So if you don’t run from your present moment experience, what’s the alternative? Staying.
- You stop moving into thoughts, and stay here…unmoving…lovingly being with whatever arises.
- You feel the urge to move into a compulsive behavior, and you open to the urge itself, being present to feel how it shows up in your body and emotions.
You stop and open to whatever appears with kindness, care, and friendliness.
I learned the power of staying firsthand, and it was a transformative insight along my path. I had been attending many retreats, mesmerized by the teachings about the nature of reality and longing to know the deepest truth that would free me from suffering.
I was like a baby bird, beak outstretched, wanting to be fed these truths so I could experience them directly.
Then one day it dawned on me that I had been completely missing the point. Instead of waiting for someone to give me the knowledge I so desperately wanted, I was being directed inward to explore my own in-the-moment experience.
And when I turned inside, worlds opened up. No wonder I was suffering! I became aware of long-buried emotions and tons of physical sensations I hadn’t realized were there. I found fears, hurts, and the arrogance of needing to be right. And I could see that these patterns were at the root of familiar story lines that had occupied my mind space for decades.
I was so excited to make space for all these feelings! Over time, I discovered that this loving attention was what they needed to loosen their grip. Finally freedom!
Over and over, I relaxed into the open space of being aware and welcomed whatever appeared. And miraculously, these patterns and identities that made up the personal sense of me unraveled.
Mental noise gave way to calm and ease…and the deepest peace beyond imagination.
Staying is simple—much simpler than avoiding, fixing, analyzing, and resisting. You don’t do anything and be.
Avoiding our experience is what separates us from the peace we really want. It leaves us lost in inner conflict with what is and desperately hoping to feel better in life.
And staying, opening fully to all that is, is peace itself. It’s the portal to realizing undivided reality, the infinite field of aliveness beyond all forms, available right here and now.
The next time you feel the urge to run, try something radical. Stop…stay…and receive what’s being offered like it’s your long lost child coming home.
