Teaching kids to drive fell to John. I was inept when it came to staying calm, which became obvious with the first few attempts. One of our cars was a manual back then, and I recall the angry grinding of an engine actively going forward while the gear shifted to reverse.
The other day, a friend reminded me about choosing what is happening. If I do favor the idea that God is in control, which I think I do, then throwing myself in reverse is bound to cause friction. Accepting that the weather, or the traffic, or the broken faucet are indeed the cards I was given today, helps me save my limited energy for responding as opposed to working against them.
"Choose this," he said as I walked away. I continued to repeat it as I changed laundry.
"Choose this. What a blessing that we have clean clothes."
I murmured it as I
filled the car with gas.
"Choose this. Having a car that works is such a gift."
One of the songs John and I wrote is called "Choose Life!" and it fills my heart when we get to sing it.
"If you return to God when you've been driven far away, and obey Him and do everything that He commands today. The Lord your God will bring you back from your captivity, He'll gather you from all the lands wherever you may be. Choose Life! Choose Life! Choose Life! Choose Life!"
It does feel like captivity to grind my inner thoughts. Allowing myself to be the passenger,
a willing one, reminds me of those children in the years before they asked for the keys. They climbed into the back seat and believed I would take them around the corner to somewhere fun. Which was my intention.