Now that that I've completely finished my ILM level 7 course I am deep into the study of 'Clean' language and its applications to coaching.
You may have heard of Clean Food and that sort of thing, and in a way this is similar in that it takes out what gets in the way. It's all about shining a light on your inner mental representations, uncovering the metaphors you use and how you actually do think. Hence
the heading - What would you like to have happen? It's a good question to ask at the start of the year ( especially now we've all let our gym memberships lapse and we haven't kept our resolutions) and especially when starting to work with a coach.
The good thing is that it strips out all the assumptions I might make about your situation and focuses your attention on what you want. Even if I ask you, What do you want to change, I am assuming that you want a change, when
actually you need a different way of looking at where you are already. Another good effect of this sort of questioning is that it takes the focus away from what you don't want. Remember being asked NOT to think of a pink elephant?
You might say to me - I feel stuck. Then so that you know what this really means (this is much
more important than that I know), we would start with a series of iterative questions, as follows, - (And) what kind of stuck (is that stuck)?
- ...until finally...
- (And) is there anything else about stuck?
The insight gained from this process can be huge!
So, can you say, what you would like to have happen?
Back to the Personal Life Analysis |
We've been looking at the questions I ask in my free Personal Life
Analysis, where you rate your satisfaction with important areas of your life. It then sends you a nice full colour chart pinpointing the areas you can focus on that are likely to make the most difference. Remember you can take it as many times as you like, for
free.
Last time we looked at your satisfaction with your work and now we will go on to your finances.
Perhaps a sore point after all the expenses of Christmas!
I am sure you are quite capable of doing the basic sums for balancing your household budget, so
I shan't insult you by going through all that. What I did want to bring to your attention though is that many of us really are financially illiterate when it comes to anything more than that. I've been reading The 100 Year Life recently, about how work, leisure, life stages and pension arrangements must change as life expectancy increases, and how important it will be to have that financial literacy when planning for later years.
Thinking of the stage you are at now in your life, do you need to do anything about that? How would you do it? What do you think? Another aspect to money and finance is that we can have unhelpful beliefs about it, along the lines of, it is wrong to have a lot of money, and then we can find we sabotage ourselves and don't have enough! Or we might go to the other extreme and think nothing is
more important. I've been interested to see how many very rich people are doing enormous and wonderful charity work; the best example I can find is Bill Gates, who has set himself the goal of eradicating polio.
So it can be a useful question to ask - what role does money play in your life?
Next time we will have a very basic look at the idea of meaning in our lives and why we seem to need
it.
Here's an intriguing study with a surprising conclusion - if you are holding a warm cup of coffee, as
opposed to a cold drink, you are more likely to perceive the person you are talking to as having a 'warmer' personality, and being more generous and caring! People in the study were also more likely to be generous to a friend.
This sort of thing is another example of why I am so fascinated with what I could
call 'popular neuroscience'!
What's going on at This Coaching Business |
You may have noticed this mailing is a bit late - I usually send it out towards the end of the month.
Apologies for this; the reason was that my car very dramatically went up in smoke and flames after an electrical fault! We were unharmed but there is a lot of sorting out to do, and I took my own medicine and had a few days off to settle down. It could have been a whole lot worse!
In February I have a few spaces left, mostly for Skype calls, and there are one or two face to face times still free. I'm happy to offer both personal and executive coaching sessions, for senior managers and entrepreneurs, especially
in health and social care. Of course this often overlaps with personal coaching as we are all people first, even if we do have super important jobs.
If you're wondering about what coaching involves and whether to undertake it yourself, you can book a short free no obligation call with me here.
Let me know if there is anything I can assist you
with, and I'll be in touch again soon. P.S. if you like this update and you got it from someone else then you can get your own personal regular copy by signing up safely here. Please feel free to share it with anyone you think may like it; just keep the attribution to me. You also get a free download on sign up that will help you increase your well being, effectiveness and resilience. |
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