=====

WHAT'S INSIDE: Learning what you can about
how to get better with women can and should be
a good thing. Just be careful about your sources.

=====



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=====



THEY'RE NOT HAPPY


Other people can feel free to meddle with your relationships
with women.

For example, do your friends and family continually offer you advice
about women and dating?  How about casual acquaintances or even
total strangers?

It doesn't matter if you are married, dating someone, dating
several someones or dating no one, does it?  It seems like everyone
has an opinion.

But have you ever wondered what state of mind those opinions are
coming from? 

If you take a moment to consider what might be driving the desire
on others' part to give you advice, you may be surprised by what
you discover. 

Let's face it, there are vast numbers of people out there who are
not happy with how their relationships have gone in the past and/or
are going now. 

Yet, if your experience is anything like mine, it's amazing how
consistently it's those sort of folks who are the ones most eager
to give us advice.  

Why is this? 

Here's what I think.  Psychological experiments have shown (which
you can find a host of references to easily through Google) that
people can have either a "poverty mentality" or an "abundance
mentality". 

An "abundance mentality" is a productive and healthy mindset that
believes there is more than enough success and prosperity in the
universe to go around. 

Someone with this field of vision is confident that he or she will
succeed and hopes that you will also.  What's more, such a person
actively pursues goals and encourages others. 

Conversely, a "poverty mentality" is frame of mind in which a
person believes there's a finite amount of success that can be
achieved.

Perhaps not surprisingly, the accompanying belief is that if any
success is to be claimed, it has to be at the expense of someone
else.

The weird part is that those who suffer from a "poverty mentality"
often look around them in despair, supposing that all the success
has largely been claimed already.

With that comes a sense that any chance of personal success is
largely hopeless, and typically everyone else is to blame for this
state of affairs (especially "greedy people").

You can imagine how this results in a pattern of intensely jealous
feelings, schadenfreude and even animosity towards those who are
successful, particularly in areas where the "poverty"-driven person
feels things are hopeless for him or her. 

These negative feelings can either be overt or covert in how they
are manifested.

So what does this all add up to? 

You got it:  Not everyone who is giving you advice has your best
intentions at heart. 

In fact, the opinions others express regarding how you should or
shouldn't conduct your relationships (or any other personal matter,
actually) must nearly always be filtered through which mindset the
one proffering the "advice" is coming from.

Next time I'll give you some objective examples of what to look
for and guard yourself against. Stay tuned.

=====






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